When I was first learning about MS after my diagnosis in 2015, the phrase “invisible disease” became a recurring motif. At first, I believed that my disease was invisible as well, until I had the realization that I just needed to know where to look, and most importantly, what I was looking for. In the…

Early January, my family and I experienced what it was like to have to rush me to the emergency room. As we live in an unincorporated rural area, we are fortunate to have a hospital just over five miles away. The bad news: in the moment that I felt a sudden pop in the middle…

Original Posting: 02/16/2017 “I have not posted since October 19th? That cannot be true! So much has happened since then,” I thought as I surveyed the chronology of my blog posts. Somewhere along the line, constant doctor’s appointments were “normalized” much like Trump’s and the so-called alternative right’s racism, and I lost sight of the…

Original Posting: 10/19/2016 I can not remember the date for sure, but I believe that I had the doctor’s appointment confirming my diagnosis one year ago today. What a difference a year makes. Last year, I had just told my mother about the health problems that I had been experiencing for the last two years,…

Original Posting: 08/24/2016 Initially, my plan was to update my blog in July, after seeing my neurologist, or on the anniversary of my first major symptoms, August 1. Both occasions, I sat down in front of the computer, glass of Pinot in hand, only to stare blankly at the cursor on the screen. Fingers gently…

Original Posting: 06/02/2016 The words hung silently in the air. I tilted my head to the side like my Papillon, Gidget. I had looked at my MS diagnosis as just that. A diagnosis. But as the phrase left my newly-discovered, naturopathic doctor’s lips, my body covered with goosies, recognizing this truth on an energetic level.…

Original Posting: 03/21/2016 I started this blog post three times, with the first one following my appointment with the neurologist on March 7. I kept stopping and restarting, unsure of what I wanted to say, but absolutely certain about what I didn’t. I had a very brief break from symptoms in November, so I am…

Original Posting:02/03/2016 When I returned to my former, short-haired glory a few weeks ago, I never imagined that I would be constantly questioned as to why I cut my hair. People have asked “why” nearly as often as strangers have mispronounced my new name. “Kesha” is still my favorite one to date. For those who…

Original Posting: 01/02/2016 I told my husband that I had spent months wondering if the symptoms I had been experiencing were the result of a continuing MS attack or if they were just resultant from the previous damage that had been done. After taking my hands off the steering wheel a little by enjoying a…

Original Posting: 12/12/2015 “No new symptoms?” “Nope.” “Any side effects from the Aubagio?” “None. Can I stay on the half dose?” “Sure. Well, barring any blood work issues, we’ll see you again in three months.” I didn’t realize how I excited I would be not to return. In the 12 office appointments, my neurologist gave…

Original Posting: 11/13/2015 I didn’t want to get too excited. I had proofread my prompts and quizzes before only to be suddenly surprised that the tale to which I had been referring should have been spelled “tail.” Or the moment when I realized how the word “weapon” was really spelled. My reality for the first…

Original Posting: 11/07/2015 My optometrist asked his usual questions in his unique and timberous voice. He was our hidden gem in an unassuming WalMart vision center. The proverbial “DIners, Drive-ins, and Dives” find in the world of optometry. He was highly intelligent and very knowledgable, although very quiet and introverted. After six years of exams…

Original posting: 11/02/2015 Anyone who has had to order my mom a latte would understand why I have an issue with being difficult when eating and drinking at food establishments. I am not the one who will send anything back, even if they get the order wrong. I am just thankful to have the meal…

Original Posting: 10/27/2015 I chose the lab because it was adjacent to my neurologist’s office, so I figured somehow this would make my life easier. It was close to campus, but so were five others. Sonora Quests are like McDonald’s, with one on every corner, but my favorite location had closed. Now that I was…

Original Posting: 10/21/2015 In the months leading up to the diagnosis, I tried to keep one toe in MS research and the rest of my body out of the proverbial autoimmune water. I live my life embracing the holographic nature of the universe and posit myself as the create-tress of my life. I believe worrying…

Original Posting: 10/20/2015 We had a few hours before picking up our sons and a few hours had passed since my doctor confirmed my diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis. We decided to stop at the Copper Still Moon Shine Grill to share a plate of nachos and toast the end of a journey. And the beginning…

Original Posting: 10/17/2015 I proceeded to explain to my husband that there was a well of tears that I had been keeping dammed in for the last week. I freely admit that I tend to rationalize my emotions. This was yet another example of a painful situation where I had just decided to set my…

Original Posting: 09/29/2015 “And you didn’t even buy me dinner first,” I replied. It was one joke in a series of many, as I laid on the table like a Maple tree, a tap sticking out of my back collecting spinal syrup. I have said many times that I believe life is too short not…

Original Posting: 09/22/2015 “And you need to avoid gluten,” my endocrinologist added. With all of the madness that had entered my life since the beginning of August, the appointment that I had made eight weeks ago seemed of little importance. I had been following a gluten-free diet most of the time since my aphasia incident.…

Original Posting: 09/19/2015 “Your echocardiogram and the ultrasounds of your arteries all came back normal. You do not have any plaque in your arteries. Does anyone know what is happening with you yet?” “The first MRI showed white matter lesions consistent with MS. My follow up for the second MRI with contrast is next Monday.”…

Original Posting: 08/26/2015 “This may be a sign of a disease called Multiple Sclerosis,” my neurologist said. I suppose many people might feel fear when hearing these words, but I finally felt relief. The immediate cause that sent me to him was an ER visit on August 2nd, when I woke up confusing numbers for…